Читать онлайн «Better Than Before: Mastering the Habits of Our Everyday Lives»

Автор Гретхен Крафт Рубин

This is an uncorrected eBook file. Please do not quote for publication until you check your copy against the finished book.

Copyright © 2015 by Gretchen Rubin

All rights reserved.

Published in the United States by Crown Publishers, an imprint of the Crown Publishing Group, a division of Random House LLC, a Penguin Random House Company, New York.

CROWN and the Crown colophon are registered trademarks of Random House LLC.

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

ISBN 978-0-385-3486-4

eISBN 978-0-385-34862-1

Printed in the United States of America

10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1

First Edition

For my family, again

The greatest of empires, is the empire over one’s self.

—Publilius Syrus

Contents

Cover

Title page

Copyright page

Dedication

Epigraph

A Note to the Reader

Decide Not to Decide: Introduction

Self-Knowledge

The Fateful Tendencies We Bring into the World: The Four Tendencies

Different Solutions for Different People: Distinctions

Pillars of Habits

We Manage What We Monitor: Monitoring

First Things First: Foundation

If It’s on the Calendar, It Happens: Scheduling

Someone’s Watching: Accountability

The Best Time to Begin

It’s Enough to Begin: First Steps

Temporary Becomes Permanent: Clean Slate

Data Point of One: Lightning Bolt

Desire, Ease, and Excuses

Free from French Fries: Abstaining

It’s Hard to Make Things Easier: Convenience

Change My Surroundings, Not Myself: Inconvenience

A Stumble May Prevent a Fall: Safeguards

Nothing Stays in Vegas: Loophole-Spotting

Wait Fifteen Minutes: Distraction

No Finish Line: Reward

Just Because: Treats

Sitting Is the New Smoking: Pairing

Unique, Just Like Everyone Else

Choose My Bale of Hay: Clarity

I’m the Fussy One: Identity

Not Everyone Is Like Me: Other People

Everyday Life in Utopia: Conclusion

Acknowledgments

Notes

Start a Better Than Before Habits Group

Resources to Request

Quiz: The Four Tendencies

Suggestions for Further Reading

A Note to the Reader

Better Than Before tackles the question: How do we change? One answer—by using habits.

Habits are the invisible architecture of daily life. We repeat about 45 percent of our behavior almost daily, so our habits shape our existence, and our future. If we change our habits, we change our lives.

But that observation just raises another question: Okay, then, how do we change our habits? That’s what this book seeks to answer.

But while Better Than Before explores how to change your habits, it won’t tell you what particular habits to form.

It won’t tell you to exercise first thing in the morning, or to eat dessert twice a week, or to clear out your office. (Well, actually, there is one area where I do say what habit I think is best. But only one. )

The fact is, no one-size-fits-all solution exists. It’s easy to dream that if we copy the habits of productive, creative people, we’ll win similar success. But we each must cultivate the habits that work for us. Some people do better when they start small; others when they start big. Some people need to be held accountable; some defy accountability. Some thrive when they give themselves an occasional break from their good habits; others when they never break the chain. No wonder habit formation is so hard.