This is an uncorrected eBook file. Please do not quote for publication until you check your copy against the finished book.
Copyright © 2015 by Gretchen Rubin
All rights reserved.
Published in the United States by Crown Publishers, an imprint of the Crown Publishing Group, a division of Random House LLC, a Penguin Random House Company, New York.
CROWN and the Crown colophon are registered trademarks of Random House LLC.
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
ISBN 978-0-385-3486-4
eISBN 978-0-385-34862-1
Printed in the United States of America
10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1
First Edition
For my family, again
The greatest of empires, is the empire over one’s self.
—Publilius Syrus
Contents
Cover
Title page
Copyright page
Dedication
Epigraph
A Note to the Reader
Decide Not to Decide: Introduction
Self-Knowledge
The Fateful Tendencies We Bring into the World: The Four Tendencies
Different Solutions for Different People: Distinctions
Pillars of Habits
We Manage What We Monitor: Monitoring
First Things First: Foundation
If It’s on the Calendar, It Happens: Scheduling
Someone’s Watching: Accountability
The Best Time to Begin
It’s Enough to Begin: First Steps
Temporary Becomes Permanent: Clean Slate
Data Point of One: Lightning Bolt
Desire, Ease, and Excuses
Free from French Fries: Abstaining
It’s Hard to Make Things Easier: Convenience
Change My Surroundings, Not Myself: Inconvenience
A Stumble May Prevent a Fall: Safeguards
Nothing Stays in Vegas: Loophole-Spotting
Wait Fifteen Minutes: Distraction
No Finish Line: Reward
Just Because: Treats
Sitting Is the New Smoking: Pairing
Unique, Just Like Everyone Else
Choose My Bale of Hay: Clarity
I’m the Fussy One: Identity
Not Everyone Is Like Me: Other People
Everyday Life in Utopia: Conclusion
Acknowledgments
Notes
Start a Better Than Before Habits Group
Resources to Request
Quiz: The Four Tendencies
Suggestions for Further Reading
A Note to the Reader
Better Than Before tackles the question: How do we change? One answer—by using habits.
Habits are the invisible architecture of daily life. We repeat about 45 percent of our behavior almost daily, so our habits shape our existence, and our future. If we change our habits, we change our lives.
But that observation just raises another question: Okay, then, how do we change our habits? That’s what this book seeks to answer.
But while Better Than Before explores how to change your habits, it won’t tell you what particular habits to form.
It won’t tell you to exercise first thing in the morning, or to eat dessert twice a week, or to clear out your office. (Well, actually, there is
one area where I do say what habit I think is best. But only one. )
The fact is, no one-size-fits-all solution exists. It’s easy to dream that if we copy the habits of productive, creative people, we’ll win similar success. But we each must cultivate the habits that work for us. Some people do better when they start small; others when they start big. Some people need to be held accountable; some defy accountability. Some thrive when they give themselves an occasional break from their good habits; others when they never break the chain. No wonder habit formation is so hard.