Copyright © 2013 by Quirk Productions, Inc.
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form without written permission from the publisher.
Library of Congress Cataloging in Publication Number: 2011946054
eISBN: 978-1-59474-594-2
Designed by Doogie Horner Cover photography by Jonathan Pushnik Cover models: Evangeline Young, Audrey Coughenour, and Damien Production management by John J. McGurk
Quirk Books 215 Church Street Philadelphia, PA 19106 quirkbooks. com
v3. 1
This book is for Anna
Contents
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve
Chapter Thirteen
Chapter Fourteen
Chapter Fifteen
Chapter Sixteen
Chapter Seventeen
Chapter Eighteen
Chapter Nineteen
ONE
Robert Arthur and Glenn Torkells were sitting in the principal’s office.
School had ended twenty minutes earlier. Their classmates were on the lush green lawns of Lovecraft Middle School, tossing Frisbees and baseballs, getting on bikes, and heading for home.
But Robert and Glenn weren’t going anywhere.
They had an appointment to see Principal Slater.
The only other person in the office was the principal’s secretary, Mrs. Polyps. Her fingers pecked frantically at her computer keyboard. Every few moments, she glanced over at the boys and smiled. Her teeth were the color of a yellow school bus.
“This is a dumb idea,” Glenn whispered.
“Shhh,” Robert said.
“No one
“We’re not hanging out,” Robert said. “We’re going to tell her the school is in danger. ”
“She’ll think you’re bonkers.
”“I can prove it. ”
Glenn snorted. “I’d like to see how you prove that an army of monsters is getting ready to attack Lovecraft Middle School. ”
Mrs. Polyps abruptly stopped typing.
“Be quiet,” Robert whispered.
“Dumb idea,” Glenn repeated. “You’ll see. ”
Underneath Robert’s chair, his backpack squirmed. Inside were his pets, a two-headed rat named Pip and Squeak. They had snuck into his backpack a few weeks earlier and they insisted on accompanying him wherever he went. Robert tapped the backpack with his sneaker until the rats fell still.
The boys waited nearly half an hour before Principal Slater opened her door. There were rumors going around Lovecraft Middle School that she used to work as an actress on daytime soap operas. Robert didn’t know if the stories were true, but they were easy enough to believe. Principal Slater was very pretty and had a warm, inviting smile. “I’m sorry to keep you waiting,” she said. “Come on back. ”
She ushered them into a sunny office lined with awards and certificates. On her desk were framed photographs of family members and pets. She sat across from Robert and Glenn and sipped coffee from a mug that read WORLD’S BEST PRINCIPAL.
“How can I help you?”
“There’s something we need to explain,” Robert said, “but it’s gonna sound a little weird. ”